


Thread and Memories

by queenpenthesilea



Series: Endgame Doesn't Mean 'The End' [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Awesome Pepper Potts, BAMF Tony Stark, Endgame Feels, F/M, Parent Tony Stark, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Tony Feels, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, and i needed a short break from studying so, endgame really fucked me up u know?, honestly i just rewatched endgame and it punched me in the gut again so this happened
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-24
Updated: 2019-05-24
Packaged: 2020-03-13 09:59:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18938641
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queenpenthesilea/pseuds/queenpenthesilea
Summary: Warning for Endgame spoilers!When Steve, Natasha, and Scott had shown up on his doorstep wanting his help, he knew the best five years of his life were coming to an end, even if he didn't want to admit it to himself.Written as a prequel to the first work in this series but can be read separately. Reading the first work is not necessary to understanding this one.





	Thread and Memories

**Author's Note:**

> This is basically a prequel to my Two More Miracles AU, written because I watched Endgame earlier today and wanted to write about what was going through Tony's mind when he figured out time travel and what made him decide to go. You don't have to have read Two More Miracles to make sense of this! And there are no spoilers for the TMM universe!

“I figured it out. By the way.”

Seven words. That was all it took to start the beginning of the end.

Pepper blinked at him, gorgeous in the firelight with long shadows dancing over her skin, the flames flickering and casting light in a way that was vaguely reminiscent of Extremis snaking under her skin but was so much more benign as to be beautiful.

“And, you know, just so we’re talking about the same thing…” she trailed off, amused as she always was when his mind wandered off on its own. 

“Time travel.”

The words dropped like a stone between them, silence hitting hard and fast.

“What?” One word, half broken, shocked but knowing far, far too much. Emotions danced across her face, raw and pained, before she schooled her expression into something more neutral before she looked back at him. Her voice gave her away, though. “Wow. That’s…amazing and…terrifying.” She was trying, he could see it, trying so hard to take on this information objectively, like an outsider listening to the news rather than someone who’d watched her now-husband fly away from her countless times with no reassurance that he’d be back.

“S’right.” He could think of nothing else to say, letting her process her emotions as he tried his best to keep from fidgeting, to hold in the agitation that had started wiggling under the surface, the itching that crawled under his skin as his mind spun with the possibilities.

She took a deep breath, and he tried not to hold his as she met his eyes, gaze steady and some semblance of calm falling over her. “We got really lucky.”

“Yeah, I know.” Did he ever. This, this made everything he’d been through worth it; Afghanistan, Obie, palladium poisoning, New York, his PTSD, AIM, Ultron, Cap…he couldn’t regret any of it, not when it had given him his beautiful wife and daughter. 

“A lot of people didn’t.”

And that was the kicker, wasn’t it? That was why he was standing here now instead of bribing his daughter with ice cream sandwiches on top of the juice pops or joining his wife on the couch and relaxing by the fire. Because he’d gotten so goddamn lucky, but a lot of people hadn’t. A lot of people had lost everything, or close to it.

“I can’t save everybody,” he said anyway.

Pepper gave him a small half-smile. “Sorta seems like you can.”

“Not if I stop,” he argued immediately. “I can put a pin in it right now. And stop.”

But she only gave him a knowing look. “Tony – trying to get you to stop has been one of the few failures of my life.”

And she knew. He could see that she knew what was going to happen; it was written all over her gorgeous, age-lined face, because she knew him too well. She knew that he was fighting down the itch right this very second, the insistent, persistent _prickle_ of the mechanic in him that whispered alluringly that _there’s something to fix and you know how to do it_. He was fighting a war with himself, and he was going to lose because he always did. 

He’d told her once that he did what he knew – he tinkered – but that was only part of it. The other part, the part that had driven a wedge between them after he’d blown up his suits and then remade them, was that he _had to tinker until the job was completely done_. He couldn’t tinker, figure out something better, and be satisfied that he knew the answer; no, if he knew how to make something better, he had to see it through, and he had to do it himself. Otherwise, the ghostly echo of Yinsen’s _don’t waste your life_ would whisper in his ear, dancing around his mind and making him question if he’d truly done enough good to outweigh the atrocities he’d committed. 

But he had a family – a wife and a daughter. _He had a family, and a decision like this wasn’t just about him_.

So he protested again, the agitation growing steadily stronger, steadily clearer. “Something tells me I should put it in a locked box and drop it in the bottom of a lake. Go to bed.”

And Pepper, his dear, sweet Pepper, looked down at her hands, then back up at him with a sad, resigned finality. “But will you be able to rest?”

 

“Sweetheart, can you hand me that wrench – no, not that one, the one next to – perfect, thanks.”

Morgan receded to her usual spot in the garage, pulling herself up so she could sit on a mostly clear table and watch quietly while he tinkered with the blue and silver suit, putting the finishing touches on the masterpiece that Tony was about 99% certain Pepper would never wear. Whatever, it made him feel better to know she would be protected if worse came to worst. Especially if…

He pushed the thought out of his mind, though it was never far from the forefront anymore, not after his talk with Pepper, after it had felt a little like they were saying good-bye. Which was silly – it had been three days and he was still here. He hadn’t decided anything yet, and having her blessing didn’t mean he was going to go gallivanting off. He had Morgan to think of.

“Who were those people, Daddy?”

Tony paused for a moment before returning to his tinkering as nonchalantly as possible. 

“They’re some of Daddy’s old friends, pumpkin.”

“Why did they visit?”

Tony hummed, twisting a screw more tightly. “They wanted my help with something. FRI, can you – yeah, just like that.”

“Are you going to help them?”

Tony glanced up at her to see her looking at him with dark, serious eyes. “I dunno, little miss. I haven’t decided yet.” She tilted her head at him.

“Why wouldn’t you?”

Tony dropped his eyes back down to the suit, resuming his work. “Well, it would take me away from you and your mom for a little while, which I’m not too happy about.”

“They were the Avengers, weren’t they?”

Tony dropped his wrench, startled as he looked at his daughter, swinging her legs back and forth as they hung off the side of the table. He’d told Morgan about some of their adventures, usually in the guise of bedtime stories, and she knew he was once Iron Man – but the Avengers were essentially retired, and Iron Man hadn’t taken to the skies since the snap, so news coverage of them was scant. And she was so young; her understanding of what Iron Man had meant, what the Avengers had stood for…it was limited, seen through a child’s perspective, and yet she had still known the people who had visited were more than they appeared. Too smart for her own good, he’d always thought wryly, and now he was having to face it.

“They were, bambina,” he said softly. She nodded, dark eyes solemn and at odds with the carefree, childish way she swung her legs. Abandoning his work for the time being, he made his way over to her, leaning against the table where she sat.

“The Avengers help a lot of people,” she said matter-of-factly, and Tony nodded mutely. She looked at him consideringly, chin tilted up as she measured him. “You help people. If you help them, you help a lot of people.”

Tony swallowed. “But then I’d be missing my two favorite girls,” he whispered past the lump in his throat. “I couldn’t leave you and Mommy.”

Morgan smiled at him, bright and sweet. “You can’t leave me, Daddy. I have you here.” And she pointed to her chest. “And you have me there.” And she tapped where the arc reactor used to sit in his chest. And then she reached up and patted his cheek, and he caught her hand with his own, running a thumb over her tiny palm. “You have to help them because you’re my Daddy, and that’s what you do.”

Speechless, Tony scooped Morgan up and drew her to his chest, pressing a kiss to her forehead and fervently ignoring the tears pricking at his eyes. He had to help them, she’d said – not because he was the superhero Iron Man, or a narcissistic war profiteer who needed to make up for past wrongs, or even because he was genius billionaire philanthropist Tony Stark – _because you’re my Daddy, and that’s what you do_.

Well. He couldn’t disappoint his little girl.

**Author's Note:**

> yeah this is cheesy as fuck, trust me I know, endgame gives me Feels man.


End file.
